It’s been more than three months now
since I first felt something amiss,
prompting me to contact the doctor
which led me down this cancerous road.
It seems a lot longer.
I’m feeling like I am slacking on fighting the good fight of faith.
God has brought me high
and has taken me low on this journey,
and I fight against my flesh more than I care to admit.
I’m a little down today, which doesn’t make any good sense.
Yesterday’s 9/11 memorial service was wonderful
and I was so thankful to have felt good enough to attend.
What a blessing it was to remember and witness, in person and on screen, the faith and courage of so many people, and their testimonies, in the face of such evil.
The church choir was superb, and the speakers amazing,
(what can I say about my Joe!)
the color guard did so well, you would never know it was their first public performance,
the presentation of hats, the bag pipes, bugle player....
I could go on and on.
But today, I had the dreaded chemo pump attached,
and although I should be elated that this is the final leg
...I am despondent.
A small lump has formed on the side of my groin
...I discovered it last night.
The doctor inspected it today and really thinks it’s a cystic growth,
rather than a cancerous lesion,
caused by a blocked sweat gland.
He was very reassuring, but still wants Dr. Moody to look at it
and get his opinion.
An appointment could not be made sooner than Sept 29th.
My Joe will be in Belarus then...and he is not happy with the timing.
So I allow this little set back to get my faith faltering
and I lift my eyes to Him and cry, Father?
Waiting for me to call on Him I am reminded of
‘Your Word for Today’ that my mother-in-law, Marie
sends out faithfully each day.
“But the Lord still waits for you to come to Him
So He can show you His love and compassion.
For the Lord is a faithful God
Blessed are those who wait for Him to help them.”
Isaiah 30:18
I am stopping now, getting my Bible and will snuggle up for some alone time with Him
...He’s been waiting for me.
Oh Momma...I agree with your friend Robert. You are but human, God does not expect perfection from you. After all if we were perfect, we would not need Him.
ReplyDeleteLoving you XOXO
A very good reminder Coley. So true. We all fall short and Linda my dear sister, you are no exception! I continue to pray for a complete healing in you. God loves you and hears you. He is near.
ReplyDeleteI love you,
Mary
It's only one set of footprints in the sand darling. He carries you in His strong, loving, faithful arms. I love you!
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